If You Can’t Bench 225…

I will say as a

Woman I lifted weights a fuck ton.

A compensating amount.

The sort of weightlifting that made you go

“What is that lady’s deal”

Now I lift weights and it’s

Easier than it used to be, almost makes it

Funny. But—

I’m still just

Me, with a little bit of a boost. Nothing crazy

I still know guys

Half my size

Who are ten times stronger than me I still see

Guys in the gym with

Nothing on them

Who can bench 225 for multiple reps and

Go home and pound the nice, sweet pussy

That didn’t care that much for his lack of muscles anyway but

He thinks he’s the biggest man in the world because

He does the one or two things he needs to in a week

To feel athletic. I see

Trans guys posting vid after vid

Pic after pic

Of how their gender and their sex is somehow

Proved by their fitness but

If you actually spend a lot of time in the gym

You notice it’s an enormous spectrum.

Steroids wax the car, they don’t redesign

The engine. And yet

Trans women in sports are treated as if

They will always and forever be

Schwarzeneggers in every ring.

It’s hard to calmly disagree

With all my perspective and experience

Janae Kroc could still snap me in half and

I doubt she struggles to bench 225

The weight

That many have told me

Is

“If you can’t bench 225 are you even a man?”

I tell you what tho man I have my doubts sometimes just as well

As anyone else, and

The closer I get to that number the more I know

225 will be the top of my range and not

A comfortable, multi-rep middle.

I think it’s unfair to claim that

2-3 years of hormones at varying doses with

Degrees of success being in range of those numbers to make me a “normal male hormone levels”

Will be enough on its own

To even the playing field. I know that it isn’t.

I’m also suspicious that

15-20 years of hormones

Won’t be quite enough

But that by then enough will have stayed the same

For the changes to really start to sink in.

Alas

I keep saying how

Testosterone is a change agent and yet

No one ever talks about

What estrogen does.

It does a lot.

It makes you soft weak and sexy as fuck.

Will there ultimately be

A hormonal and structural difference

Between cis men and me? I find it hard to believe that

Synthetic testosterone for a handful of years

Evens the playing field.

I am of course excited to keep changing but

I dunno man

Until I get to 225

For multiple easy reps and sets

I will be doubting myself and the whole road that I chose

Simply because I see so many young dudes at the gym

Easy breezy beautiful deadlifting 500.

The closest story I’ve found about

Trans men in weightlifting is this one guy

Who can deadlift 500, but

I know lots of women who can do that,

And so does he.

I’ve also seen

17 year olds deadlift 650


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