A New Kind Of Healing

Sometimes I feel like

Top surgery

Gave me the keys to my own home.

Finally let me in from the cold

It was like I was living

Homeless in my own fucking yard

Paying the mortgage and walking the dog

All to sleep in the bushes

Looking in at others warm inside my own wealth

Being jealous of the love I give to others as if

I am somehow unable to give it to myself—

No more. Now I feast in my own house

With my own heart with my own soul.

I am no longer hungry for the food I have

Laying around, untouched and abundant

I am not just some envious peasant I am

My own king and even when I fail —

I feel amazing.

As the swelling settles I find a new kind of healing happening, all around me.

The nerve pains come and go, even this weird

Twitching in my belly is starting to settle. My body feels

Stronger, somehow— despite being

Carved from the inside out.