A New Kind Of Healing
Sometimes I feel like
Top surgery
Gave me the keys to my own home.
Finally let me in from the cold
It was like I was living
Homeless in my own fucking yard
Paying the mortgage and walking the dog
All to sleep in the bushes
Looking in at others warm inside my own wealth
Being jealous of the love I give to others as if
I am somehow unable to give it to myself—
No more. Now I feast in my own house
With my own heart with my own soul.
I am no longer hungry for the food I have
Laying around, untouched and abundant
I am not just some envious peasant I am
My own king and even when I fail —
I feel amazing.
As the swelling settles I find a new kind of healing happening, all around me.
The nerve pains come and go, even this weird
Twitching in my belly is starting to settle. My body feels
Stronger, somehow— despite being
Carved from the inside out.