Ever been so sad you stopped writing?
For two whole days, even???
Who am I and what have I done with myself, I think
I’ve started drinking absinthe again.
The last time I did this I was
At the lowest part of my life so I feel it’s fitting
I knew what to grab in a pinch, I also
Feel warm with the memories
Of the strangest and kindest and most empathetic man
I’ve ever met, who really truly just wanted
To get drunk and talk about life and music, with
Absolutely no sexual or romantic expecation.
It was so rare for me to have moments like that with men
Back when I was a fat lesbian, the problem with most dicks is that
They get chubby when I’m around them. Sigh, it just
Made me feel understood
For nobody to want to slide under my hood.
I can’t tell if I want to get drunk
On absinthe, or if I just want to go back to a time in my life
Where people just wanted to talk
With no expectations. Something I’ve been looking for