Ever been so sad you stopped writing?

For two whole days, even???

Who am I and what have I done with myself, I think

I’ve started drinking absinthe again.

The last time I did this I was

At the lowest part of my life so I feel it’s fitting

I knew what to grab in a pinch, I also

Feel warm with the memories

Of the strangest and kindest and most empathetic man

I’ve ever met, who really truly just wanted

To get drunk and talk about life and music, with

Absolutely no sexual or romantic expecation.

It was so rare for me to have moments like that with men

Back when I was a fat lesbian, the problem with most dicks is that

They get chubby when I’m around them. Sigh, it just

Made me feel understood

For nobody to want to slide under my hood.

I can’t tell if I want to get drunk

On absinthe, or if I just want to go back to a time in my life

Where people just wanted to talk

With no expectations. Something I’ve been looking for

Ever since.

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