Alien Invaders
My cats are ridiculous
I know everyone feels this way
About their pretty little pussies
But mine aren’t actually cats
They’re aliens with furry little bodies
Logging my every move
Following me, constantly.
They are very, very pretty
They often ask for food
I give it to them, freely
Because otherwise
They climb onto my shoulders
into my brain stem
And implant their plan directly
They don’t like to wait, you see
They get very, very hungry
Aliens travel a long ways
To get to where they are
So you better give them food–
Promptly–
Or else–
you’ll probably get probed
And it’s not that pleasant,
Peasant.