…Am I A Dissident ?

How did I end up like this

I was a straight a student !

Somehow I woke up

With a man’s soul with a

Woman’s life and I’ve got to solve

All her problems. I feel like everything I do

Is disonant within myself even though

I am stronger than I’ve ever been yet I feel

Weaker than ever, with my anger bleeding out

Into every conversation with everyone I’ve met

I don’t want to see, or talk to—

Anyone ever again.

Nobody understands— yet I’m a

Full-grown adult man and I am

Too far behind for any of this to make sense.

Why try to convince others of a truth

I’m too ashamed to admit, when I feel as if

I will always be a woman! Perhaps I am non-binary

To make light of gender, I need to! I desperately need to joke

About gender and sex and people and folk because

I feel like a fucking joke of a man

It’s not enough for me to be a joke

I need to make a joke of all of you people

You nonsense folk who’ve made a fetish out of

Calling me other, well guess what

I’ll own that title. I am other— nothing like you at all

Non-you, non-her, non-him

I’ve got more in common with a fucking squash plant —

My balls fall right off when the wind blows too hard

But in all seriousness,

Go fuck yourself! Love—

A die-hard dissident

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