Binding as Peacocking–The Image Problem of Trans Identity
I think it’s ridiculous to make
All trans male, enby
Nonbinary resources focused on
Binding as a way to ease dysphoria.
I’m sure that there are loads
Of benefits to top surgery
I can’t wait to experience them
However, for me, personally
Existing as a trans man
Has not been made easier by binding–
It almost exclusively makes my life worse.
When I first started transitioning
I wanted something I could do
As a sort of “preview”
But honestly, all binding did
Was make me feel like
I had no chance in hell. It just made me think
I was too fat, too soft, too tittied
To be a man.
Which is why I needed to wear a binder–
You know– to try and…
With who, exactly?
Who else wears binders?
I think I’ve seen some cis men
Admit to wearing some, for special occasions
Kind of like how some people wear spanx ~/
But like ~/
I feel that as a society
We understand that spanx are not good
For your mental health.
It’s also not good to put filters
On your face, body, and everything else
You can’t filter your life to be a more
Purified, polished version
You can’t press your tits down
And know what it means to be a man!
In a world where the strongest, tallest
Manliest men somehow still feel inadequate–
What is the binder doing, exactly?
Are you feeling more like yourself
Or are you feeling more like everyone else
Does it help you to suffer more than you should?
Why is that?
Are you punishing yourself for being born
In a way that was out of your control?
Seems pretty fruitless, yo!
I think binding is a community thing
I think binder giveaways are creating
An environment where you can
Prove that you’re trans.
“Trans men need binders”
“Nonbinary folx need binders”
Maybe sometimes, maybe not always
What about the cis boy I saw
When we went to mexican last week
Who had tits only
Two shakes smaller than mine?
Should I give him
Do I tell him about my
How do I explain
The nonsense, the insanity
That is performing trans identity
For other trans people
More than your own fucking standards
Do gender confirming surgeries help
Some people feel better?
Of course! The proof is all over the place–
But we need to stop talking about these issues
As a one-size fits all approach
We don’t need “medical grade binders”
We need compassion and understanding–
We need resources about how to
Ease gender dysphoria that have
Nothing to do with what you look like.
You know what helps me
Feel like a man?
Learning, building, creating
Shouting, bragging, boasting, uplifting
Playing, sporting, fucking, celebrating
Giving life to others in spontaneous ways
Sometimes letting your emotions get carried away
That, to me, is what a man is
That, to me, is what transitioning has been
For me, my trans identity
Has nothing to do with image.