Broken Record/Good Deeds
Every gay person knows how many
Minutes there are in a year–
As a fat person I know
How many calories are in a pound of fat.
I’ve known since I was in middle school.
I know how many calories
Are in a tbsp of olive oil
I know the difference between
A tbsp and a tsp, and I can
Eye ball it, honestly.
I know the difference between
Good carbs and bad carbs and I know about
The healthy fats and the hydrogenated ones–
I know about protein and probiotics.
I know of the shit
You think I don’t, and
I’ve already learned
The hard truths
You don’t have to learn, because
I never had a choice–
It’s not a hobby to me, the way
Health and fitness is a hobby for so many–
The way veganism is a belief
Practiced, until guilty pleasures set in.
It’s what I was raised with
It’s the discipline I was given
All of the discipline so many insist
I lack is the very discipline with which
I harbor disdain, I am unable to control
My own contempt I am
Broken, mind bent on fat
A broken record just the same.
I know how many minutes are in a year
How many calories are in a pound of fat
And how many good deeds
Punish me
With the best of intentions.