Contradictions

Why are we all

Too proud

While also

Too small?

Why can’t I be

Loud ! And still

Feminine, insightful ?

Why can’t I feel

Proud of where I’ve come from

What I’ve done

and who I’ve become ?

I am shrinking

At the sight

Of who I could have been

Unable to see myself

Smothered in the shadow

Of my disappointment.

I will fight another day

I suppose

I don’t want to

I just have to see

Where this goes

I’m living

Out of sheer curiosity

But I’m dying

On the inside

Slowly, methodically

The way I was trained.

I just wish I knew

Why everyone pretends

Like nothing is happening

When everything obviously is


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