I know I’m not supposed to say this but

Sometimes I deadname myself

In my own head

Or even dream as though I have never transitioned

I don’t really feel any different and sometimes I wonder if my

Subconscious hasn’t caught up yet.

Admitting it or even saying it makes me somehow feel

Less than, and yet I know that I am more than that.

Anyway. I don’t think it’s a huge deal but

I do think these dabs are strong enough

To give somebody a heart attack.

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