Fat Face/Thin Face/Salt/Space
All of the most dramatic,
Impactful, crippling, socially and physically
Emotionally degrading and
Dehumanizing experiences I’ve had
With other people
Are due to the fat on my face and neck.
I see people with severe morbid obesity
With thin faces
Who get by just fine, alas
Cushing’s syndrome made sure
That every person I meet
Even if it’s just through my headshot—
They only see fat, and all the connotations
That come with that.
It wouldn’t matter if I was
Male, female, non-binary, straight, cis, or queer in any way—
On my face and neck
From a disease I had that broke
My bones and my back —
The fat is all anyone sees, it’s all anyone
Cares to know about me.
I am mad about that.
I am starting to worry that
I don’t want to be a queer podcast at all—
I’m too fat to be queer, too fat to be
One of the people “the community” deems
A leader, and to be honest
If I could
I would drive this community
Straight into the ground, straight into the earth
Salt all your wounds and
Disrespect your worth, largely due
To the fact that
That’s the only kind of behavior
I’m familiar with in this space,
The space I occupy with
The weight of the world.