Fat Face/Thin Face/Salt/Space

All of the most dramatic,

Impactful, crippling, socially and physically

Emotionally degrading and

Dehumanizing experiences I’ve had

With other people

Are due to the fat on my face and neck.

I see people with severe morbid obesity

With thin faces

Who get by just fine, alas

Cushing’s syndrome made sure

That every person I meet

Even if it’s just through my headshot—

They only see fat, and all the connotations

That come with that.

It wouldn’t matter if I was

Male, female, non-binary, straight, cis, or queer in any way—

The fat

On my face and neck

From a disease I had that broke

My bones and my back —

The fat is all anyone sees, it’s all anyone

Cares to know about me.

I am mad about that.

I am starting to worry that

I don’t want to be a queer podcast at all—

I’m too fat to be queer, too fat to be

One of the people “the community” deems

A leader, and to be honest

If I could

I would drive this community

Straight into the ground, straight into the earth

Salt all your wounds and

Disrespect your worth, largely due

To the fact that

That’s the only kind of behavior

I’m familiar with in this space,

The space I occupy with

The weight of the world.