I Never Even Ordered A Fruity Cocktail…

I guess what I’ve been stuck on lately is that

The only thing about me

Before I transitioned

That was feminine– was my sex observed at birth, and

The intense female social conditioning I received that make it so that

I still can’t state my own worth.

Those qualities, with a testosterone filter

Just turned me into a new perception with which

I still haven’t caught up. The only thing about me

That was non-binary before

Was my sex assigned at birth.

That persists, still

What would it have to do with anything else?

I never had a femme day in my fucking life

I enjoyed some of the lady perks, like

Toilets that aren’t just for shitting

And eating salad without it being

Some sort of bold statement.

But honestly I never even ordered a fruity cocktail–

Shit would make my masculinity punch a wall.

Why is it that I’m forced to be categorized as

Binary trans…? Is it because of the modern trending understanding

Of beards + dresses = “non-binary gender expression”

Again, a mix of male and female

Is more of a binary+ than it is

A diet–

If ya’ll were really

Truly

Against the gender binary

You’d be anti-gender, not

Non-binary. Just means

Not of the binary.

Again– accepting and including

Binary identities as well as non-binary/binary+ identities

I suppose non-binary is fine I just

Really think the “war on the cis”

Is a bit old hat.

Honestly straight up–

I was kicked out of a sapphic facebook group

For having a binary name and saying I was a

Trans man. Either they thought

I was faking, or what– IDK

If you can’t be a heterosexual, masculine-presenting non-binary man

Then this queer voice, and this queer body

Is also not allowed in.

~~~~~~

Man I tell you what times they are a changin’

I never in a million trillion years

Thought I would end up where I am, and

I never in a billion zillion millennia

Would have predicted

That I would be empathizing this much with men,

Or that I would seriously consider

Getting pregnant. lmfao jesus

What kind of nonsense is confidence


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