…I’m Smart and Nice and Funny

I can’t tell if it’s because I’m doing really well

Or if it’s because I’m just kind of awesome but

People at work are so nice to me

They’re like

He’s so smart and nice and funny

Now they’re like

Wait

Why did your ex leave you…?

You left her …? Why ?

Ain’t nothin wrong with you my man

From strangers people

Strangers.

I was like —

I gotta go home and tell my other nice strangers about this

The nice strangers on the internet that also potentially think

I’m smart and nice and funny

And then I realize

That I’m that way

Because I hate the way other people are.

I try to be the difference

I am the bigger person and

I don’t have any patience any longer

For people that choose to see me

As some sort of bloated monster

Instead of the gentle giant that I am

Because I choose to be, actively, each minute.

The only time I’m not is when

I’m being accused or mistreated.

I think it’s kind of textbook defensive but

If you’d lived my life you’d be guarded as all heck