Law and Order Candidate—Becky WTGH

I like laws and rules ect.

It’s a good concept.

People should enjoy boundaries

They make people happy!

I love when everybody follows the rules

Because the rules are fair and safe.

It’s easy to reciprocate

The love a good law gives you.

I want to be a lawyer,

But everyone tells me

I will hate it.

As if they know?

I’m focusing on other things, at the moment

Maybe I will get to law school

And make them eat it.

Or maybe I will be a

Radio star, and video will kill me.

Oh, what a way to go!

Killed by MTV

How utterly disgraceful that would be

In today’s time

To be killed

By music television

That never plays music, only plays

Titties fighting other titties with

Dicks screaming nonsense and


Mud-wrestling is something I’ve only ever seen


Maybe they should change their name

From Music Television

To Mud-wrestling television

With an extra side of

Big ‘ol fake titties

I think it should be illegal

To cut open female bodies

And put silicone hackey-sacks

Where functioning tissue ought to be.

I’ve never seen a woman

With tits too small.

Too big, yes.

Jesus Christ, this is off-topic

I used some hyphens, I’ve been avoiding them

You see, I’ve been beaten with grammar

But none of it took

Cuz I’m a weird millennial kind of poet

And I write my own law-books

Language is living

I am dead

I think maybe the dead

Can’t be corrected, or is that

Just dead men

Telling no tales

Cuz they got rejected

From Yale.

Have you heard about the college admissions scheme?

Who the fuck didn’t know

That these idiot inbred asshats

Didn’t get in the hard way?!

I was in class with these people

I saw that they didn’t know

They were very insecure, defensive

They also failed with aplomb

Signed up for fraternity

Called home, and graduated


Laws don’t matter here, in America

I would say “fuck the po-po!”

But they don’t know

They’re the best of the football team

That didn’t have grades to show

So they’re policing us now

Protecting us with their brave, brave souls.

The ones that get to college

Are opportunists, desperate, seeking

Dominance anyway they can

Why not try it in the classroom,

Young man?

Law and order

Is a set of demands

Men made to protect themselves

From other men.

In Ancient Greece, women were property

Only older men were free, individual

Oh what a joy, it would be

To go back in time

And be one of those dickswingers

In the white robes

Sitting, pondering

Writing manifestos that made women

Slaves by “biology”

Ain’t nothing but philosophy

If I had been one of them

I really see myself in Plato, at times

His poetry and his plays

He strikes me as queer,

If you don’t mind me saying.

Law and order, like I said

Is a man’s philosophy

Enacted by us all.

Lmao, imagine–

The outrage created by Star Wars

Just for having a chick lead the role

Imagine having our laws

Crafted by these “lesser beings”

Imagine what the world would be like

If Becky WTGH had a say–

how different things would be

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