More About Him
I mean like
Yeah I was always male in my head, I had
Clear distinct conflict with this as a kid and
Made my voice clear
My parents dismissed it and did their best to make me conform to girlhood but I refused
My dad still has a lot of issues with all of this
I don’t understand what he doesn’t understand
About it being none of his business
I also am genuinely confused
As a prospective parent myself I cannot imagine
Being more interested in my idea of who the child is
Than the reality of who my child is
I can’t imagine not listening
I can’t imagine not caring
I can’t imagine not knowing I can’t imagine
Being my parent
And not knowing me
Or wanting to but
It’s been thirty years and I have finally accepted that
My dad will never ask me how I am and actually want to hear the answer
He won’t respect my name or my pronouns
His political ideology and philosophy prevent him
From respecting his own children
I can’t imagine being so gay for trump
That you love your kid less
But that’s the situation I’ve been living in
For some reason all the financial independence in the world
Doesn’t ease the pain or the frustration
I just can’t understand
Why he expects me to care
More about him than myself.