Sex and Love
People think that sex and love are the same thing.
This has become kind of obvious to me.
I don’t understand?
They are separate
They are not the same
They are two different things
Made differently.
Sex; is an activity–
You do it.
Love; is a state of being–
You experience it.
You can experience sex, but
You’re still doing it.
You can experience love, but
You can’t control it–
No one has control over
Who and what and how they love–
Love is bigger than we can understand.
Whether or not
You love someone
Is not relevant
To the activity of sex.
Sadly.
I, as a demisexual
Can only become aroused
For and by someone
Of which I am romantically invested.
It’s a blessing and a curse, the
Blessing being that I
Have a clear and finite understanding
Of what it’s like to
Fuck someone and not love them, and
Vice versa.
The experiences for me have been
Dramatically different.
I am never able to orgasm with someone
I don’t having feelings for, vs.
When my girlfriend touched me
For the first time
On my nipple I
Came so hard I
Cried a bit–
What the fuck babe
What kind of magic are you?!
The point is,
Love and sex
Are not
Related.
They are the most
Fantastic compliment, like
Peanut butter and chocolate, or
Peanut butter and jelly, or
Peanuts in a bucket or
Peas in a pod in a peanut butter jar
All sorts of different types of
Peanut butter harmonies
You can also have
Incredible fantastic sex
With someone
That you are not in love with
Whatsoever
I think the straights call
Those people “fuckbuddies”–
Again, here in MAI
I try to stick to what I’m best at
So I can’t speak for what it’s like
To have tons of incredible
Casual sex where you
Thought you were in love
But it was just fucking all along!
This predicament
Is in enough movies and
Rom coms for me to
Not feel too strongly about
Including it in the poem.
I suppose it must be
Exhausting to be so sexual that
The sex alone is enough to
Fall in love, but
For me that is not how it works
For me,
Sex and love are separate
But when they are both
There, my heart fills
So much with love it feels as if
My blood is made of bliss
And my eyes can’t stay
In their sockets, bulging and
Crying and emotionally exploding
Oh and
Lots and lots and lots and lots of coming
So yes
Sex and love are together but
It’s rare and it’s
The stuff that all the
Poems are about, it’s not
Typical and it’s not
The norm, at least based on
What I see around town.