Short Fat Straight White Guy/So Fucking Boring

The five worst things you can be

To a member of the online queer community lmfao

Happens to also be who I am and

The goal of my transition, add

“Rich” to that list and you’ve got my

Five year plan, bitches!

I don’t understand why it is that

I’m supposed to silence

All of who I am to make

Other trans people happy

While they brag about the euphoria they feel

Taking hormones with absolutely no frills or thrills

I’m genuinely relieved and blessed

By the overwhelming blissful boredom that is

Being transgender, and slowly becoming

More at peace.

Ain’t nothing entertaining about any of this

Unless you’re full of doubts or

Unable to transition or

Honestly just a transphobic Cis

Why would I want to turn myself into a spectacle

A euphoric carnie, a Ripley’s believe it or it’s not funny

I don’t know what you all expect from me

I’ve come to resent all forms of “trans representation” because

Not a single one of them explains how

Incredibly fucking boring it is.

Slow, painful, downright tedious.

I don’t think enough has been said

About trans people just fucking existing

Boring as shit

Can’t one person just admit that it’s

Fucking boring as hell ?

Can’t somebody emphasize

For once, besides myself

How desperately wonderful it is

To be bored after 28 years of blistering anxious self awareness

To finally be able to nod off to sleep

In your own skin

Feeling the bristle against your

White ass pillow

All I ever wanted to be in the world was some

Schmoe and I’m finally home, I don’t

Want to give out tips I want to

Rest up, for once, and be fucking bored.


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