Strain Names

Most of all culture

Makes little sense to me

But more than anything

Cannabis culture

Means absolutely nothing

Makes no fucking sense

Whatsoever

To anyone

What the fuck? who decided

To name a strain

Ak-47?!?!

Who the fuck is in charge here!?!?

If I were to name a strain

I would name it

Wonder woman

Because

All flowering cannabis plants

Are female

Because flowers

Are the female reproductive function of plants

It’s how they make seeds, eventually

But cannabis is different!

You chop that sucker down

Right at her climax, right when she is

Just about to nut, you chop her, dry her

Store her and cure her

Preserved powerfully

For eternity, sealed off with

Metal bands around the tops of the

Jars, yes–

Wonder woman would be a great strain name

Also

Fluffy nutter

Sweet Sticky Jane

No-bra-sativa

Empress Lavender

Rey Gun

Chewbaccachip cookies

Wooly Mammoth

Satie Rising

Bluem

Lady Labia

Lungfucker

Melon Calling

Laf Hack

Bush wick

 


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