The Myth Of Fat Uneducation

The most common things I hear as a fat person

Are that

1. I must not have been disciplined as a kid

2. I don’t understand portion sizes

3. I don’t know which foods to eat and which to avoid

4. I am suffering from a food addiction

All of these things

Are utterly

Preposterous

Imagine existing

Your whole life

As a fat person—

Do you have any idea

The number of hours I’ve spent

At a medically trained nutritionists office?

Do you have any idea

How often I have my bloodwork checked?

Do you have any concept

Of what it is like

To have your body policed

Since you were a 6 year old girl—

Reading labels

Counting calories

Measuring portions

Learning how much sugar is in orange juice—

These are all things I learned

Before I turned seven years old.

I have had a food scale

Since I was 12

I have food logs that go back

For years.

I know more about

How to eat

How to count calories

How to control portions

How to measure cooking oil

How to wipe the pan with a towel

To use as little as possible—

I know more about

How to lose weight

Than anyone

Who hasn’t had to do it.

I learned all of this

At an age

That an outside perspective

Might consider abusive.

I believe it was traumatic

Dehumanizing

Belittling and

Set me up

For a lifetime of suffering.

As evidenced by my

Complete and utter inability

To coexist peacefully

All because of some

“Fat education”

I keep getting

Every week

Every month

Every year

Over and over and over again

From a new doctor in a new town I

Just started to see since I moved, or

A new friend who doesn’t know

The history of all my war wounds

Nobody knows

How much I’ve been through

But me.

And yet

I am “educated”

On a regular basis

By people who study health and diet

As a theory.

~~

I will

Never forget

The time in my masters degree

Where a friend of mine

Sent me a link to myfitnesspal

Explaining how amazing and easy it was

To count calories on your phone—

He weighed 145 pounds and he

“Was able to get down to 140

In a week, using myfitnesspal!”

I didn’t know how to respond

Considering

The first calories I counted

Were before middle school even started.

That’s why I say

The myth of fat uneducation—

It is simply impossible

To exist on this earth

As a fat person

And not have access to

All the information

Everyone else has access to.

The main difference being—

When you are exposed, how severely

And how many times you’ve been

Over-reminded

Of your “lack of education“

About a subject that controls your whole fucking life.