Took Me A While But Now I See It

My whole life people been telling me

“You’re intimidating”

Why? How? I’m so funny and

I literally couldn’t hurt someone if I tried I have many times and I usually

Just cave and cry.

I can be defensive and if you

Come for me in a way that I think is petty

I’ll dish you back something, so I guess that makes me

Intimidating. If you prefer me to be

A doormat, or a sad sap, or some kind of

Piece of trash that you can throw away

I might be inclined to say something on my behalf–

I don’t think that’s crass.

But the other problem is I just have so many dreams

I have so many goals I do so many things

That alone can be intimidating. Often times people just assume I’m lazy

Because I’m fat, and that sets me off. I don’t enjoy that.

I’m not any of the negative things I am loudly

On a mission and I guess now I am starting to see

Why to some I might be intimidating.

I don’t settle for anything.

I see beyond so easily and I articulate it clearly

When I voice my opinions at work or with friends sometimes

They get quiet and

Intimidate me into silence.

See, that’s the part I don’t understand

When you want to share insights but

They aren’t popular, or whatever. I don’t know I think it’s just that

An expectation is set by a certain perspective I have no control over and then

It’s overturned, and I either benefit from it or I don’t.

I just wish I could speak to people directly, the way

I see others get to. I wish it were easier but I also

Can’t be any other way than this, I am simply built like this.

I have always been asking things too personal and

Making people laugh just because

I love the response I get. I love an audience

I am a bit of a superstar in hiding so

Maybe that’s it.