Totally Separate From Gendah/People, Places and Things

I think there are



And things—

Nouns, so to speak.

I also think there are


Pieces of words we use to

Suggest gender, individuals and groups

Like little nuts, bolts and screws.

I believe in adjectives !!

Radical shit–

Delightful, dastardly and downright descriptive.

When I started my journey

Of all this I was certain

I knew what I was doing and

Now that I have lived it

I wonder

What it is

Non-binary folks want

That they can’t get, and the truth is

They want to be able to control

How they are perceived

By other people.

Trans people do not control

How other people treat them.


Doesn’t fucking matter

Cis people do not control

How other people treat them they simply

Fit inside the pre-existing frame.

The people, places and things

That exist

That I believe in

That I meet as I walk throughout society largely in

The American south, and Midwest— I wonder

There is no infrastructure existing

For non-binary people to fit into a frame.

At times I wonder if what they want

Is to destroy all frames

Alas, frames are actually

Super dope and handsome

They make pictures look better

Have you ever been to an art museum

And seen a work of art

Before the curator was able to frame it?

It’s fucking naked.

It’s vulnerable

It’s amateurish almost without

Some strong dark mahogany holding it up.

Sure sure sure

Loads of art doesn’t need a frame but

Even sculptures have a base—

Even sculptures require

Engineering to hold it up and to make it

Last for longer than a few days

You need to have infrastructure

To thrive, to survive

You can create your own

But if you start swimming

The length of the ocean

And complain that no one is throwing you

A life vest, from their cruise ship

Perhaps you should’ve just bought a ticket —

Maybe there are places I could live

Places I could work

That accommodate non-binary people

Alas I have never encountered that

Not my “liberal progressive friends”

Not my “conservative religious parents”

Not my work, not my home, not my vacation

I don’t feel unsupported the same way

A dandelion doesn’t feel decapitated

I simply had to evolve and find a new way

To stretch into my new life, with skin

So tight it cracks and bleeds and leaves

A network of marks for all to see

I am not against non-binary people—

I am not against micro dosing

I am pro-reality I am

Pro-health and I am

Pro-home. You need to find home

Within yourself somehow

Without being able to blame

Everyone on the outside.

If the methods you use do that

Are surgery and hormones—

Bravo, but

If you are like me—

A non-binary

Angry, lost, frustrated, looking for

A wall to punch, I might remind you that

Being non-binary is not something

You have to change yourself for.

Hormones take you from one side

To the other. You can’t adjust your code

To be between, you can’t wish yourself intersex

And if you have surgery it’s irreversible af

Best question to ask might be

What is it gonna take

To make people understand?

For me it was becoming a man, and knowing

Who I am. I am both a man

And a woman, and I can’t expect the world

To respect my identity I can’t

Demand respect

From anybody

Nor do I deserve to, the same way

None of us do. If you want

To be respected

Show it to yourself, and teach others

How to treat you.

I didn’t realize the extent to which

People disrespected women until

I wasn’t being read as one, any longer.

Now that I’m a short fat soft sensitive poet pussy man

Lmfao I still get mad disrespected bro

Mad disrespect.

The only difference really

At the end of the day

Is how I see myself.

The way the world is now there are

Men and women and

It matters not if you are trans —

Only if you are compliant.

If that bothers you you might have

Plans and agendas totally separate

From gendah—

Just saying.

3 Replies to “Totally Separate From Gendah/People, Places and Things”

  1. Kimber;ly Hoare

    I read your blog when it came through in my email. I am a bisexual, queer and androgynous lady who’s curiousity and willingness to learn made me take a look at other LGBTQA people in a new light. I’m here and I am accepting and supporting of all of us. I found your article profoundly moving and very deep. I feel that I have gained a better understanding of things from your point of view. Thank you! ~ Kimberly Ann Hoare

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